Know Your Hat! Creating Healthy Relationships at Work
Issue: July 2010 by Lynchburg Business in Healthcare, Inside The Magazine
We all wear several hats in our lives simultaneously. Within each role, there are differing expectations and codes of conduct. Sometimes we may find ourselves in a “dual relationship,” one in which we have two or more roles with the same individual, such as personal friend and co-worker. Given that most people spend eight hours a day, five days a week at work, dual relationships are inevitable; some occur just by chance, and some by design, as when friendships and even romances develop.
Dual relationships are not unethical or problematic in and of themselves. Meeting new friends or even romantic partners at work can enhance work satisfaction and promote team cohesion if they are handled well. However, there are issues that should be considered to ensure such relationships do not become detrimental to the employee, fellow co-workers or the work team as a whole.
Although employees do not choose their co-workers, the expectation is to treat everyone fairly and equally; conduct should be characterized by professionalism and objectivity, as well as by an attitude of amicability and cooperation. One’s private, personal life is an entirely different matter: Here one has the privilege of choosing exactly who to spend time with, as well as how, when and where. Boundaries between these two aspects of life are needed, as well as a consideration of issues that may emerge when dual relationships develop. Unethical or detrimental conduct can be avoided if we are mindful of what hat we are wearing.
Friendships
It is not a problem if two or more people go out to dinner after work. But a problem may arise the next day if these same people chatter about their soirée without regard for team members who were not invited. Discussion of plans and outings that are private and personal can be sensitively handled outside of work to avoid hurt feelings. If such boundaries are not respected, divisiveness may ensue because some team members may feel alienated and excluded, leading to poor team morale.
When romance between two co-workers develops (i.e.-between people for whom no power imbalance exists), and is handled well, it can be a source of amusement and fun for the whole work team. Again, the two involved must be aware of their hat. At work, they need to maintain professionalism; while at play, they are free to enjoy their newfound partnership.
Avoid Perceived Favoritism
In most situations, it is best for socialization to occur between individuals who are peers, (i.e.-on the same hierarchical level in the organizational structure and neither supervises, or is supervised, by the other). A supervisor who is planning a social event would be best to include everyone on the work team. Supervisors, who socialize with only certain employees, are risking the creation of a divisive work environment. It may smack of favoritism to those not included; they may feel unfairly treated and develop a negative work attitude, which can undermine the team.
Beware of Power Imbalances
The most problematic relationship is one involving a romance in which there is a power imbalance between the two involved. Power differentials raise questions about the appropriateness, judgment and ethics of the supervisor as well as about the ability of the supervisee to exercise free choice. This may occur because a supervisor has power and authority over the supervisee in terms of job security, advancement and even perceived importance by virtue of the supervisor’s status within the organization. Some companies have found such conduct so improper that it is cause for immediate dismissal of the supervisor from the organization.
If couples choose to pursue romantic involvement when one member of the couple is in authority over the other, the high road might be for one of the individuals to find a different job outside of the organization or for the supervisor involved to discuss the ethical dilemma openly with his or her superior and ask to be reassigned.
Choosing Professionalism
Companies can promote a professional environment by discussing workplace relationships and outlining some of the tricky issues. Relationship decisions need to be deliberate and conscious. Such awareness allows employees the enjoyment of good personal relationships both in and away from the work environment.